"How's the campaign going?"
It's the question I get most often. It's also the question I'm never quite sure how to answer.
Good? ... Great! ... Your guess is as good as mine. ... We'll see May 17th!
The truth - I suppose - all depends on what you're measuring.
This weekend we hosted a Winter ONE-derland party in honor of Felix's first birthday. Considering this child was born during a snow, it seemed like an appropriate theme. Well, the weather had other plans and it was 70 and sunny! I could have hosted the dang party outside!
For my 30th birthday, I created a list of 30 things I wanted to do. One was to write a historical fiction short story. This is the story and as Ruby keeps calling to me here lately. I thought I'd share it here.
One of Nicholas's New Year's resolutions was to try freezer meals. He'd prepped meals for the week on and off through 2015 and wanted to see how it would work to prepare an entire month's worth. Then, we could just pull a meal from the deep freeze, throw it in the crockpot, and on a busy day dinner would be waiting for us.
Despite my early holiday decorating, I attempt to save holiday music until after Thanksgiving. I say attempt because every year I try and every year an artist comes out with a new holiday album and I have to reevaluate my stance.
This year I was doing good until I saw this:
Credit David Broome, UPI
When Michael Brown was shot and killed by Darren Wilson on August 9, two stories emerged. The first - complicated in its own right - is what happened between these two people. Some things we know for sure. Michael Brown was black, 18 years old, and unarmed. After being shot, he laid in the street for four hours. Darren Wilson was white, a police officer, and armed.
Like any other violent altercation, the evidence is anything but conclusive. Memory is flawed. Witnesses conflict each other. We all interrupt events through the prism of our own perception. However, a grand jury found that there was not probable cause to charge Darren Wilson with illegal use of lethal force.
That would seemingly be the end - at least legally - to the first story.
However, the second story is much bigger than the events that took place between those two people on August 9th. The second story is what the death of Michael Brown illustrates about black communities and white police forces, the militarization of our police forces, the legal responsiblity of police officers who use deadly force, and much much more.
What bothers me is there seems to be a fundamental misunderstanding about what the conclusion of one story means to the other. When Michael Brown was first killed, the was a narrative that he was gunned down with his back turned and arms up. As the physical evidence suggested otherwise, all of a sudden all the valid criciticisms of our criminal justice systems and its treatment of the black community seemed to fall on deaf - mainly white - ears.
So, let me just say, I don't really care if Michael Brown stole those cigarellos. I don't care if he was disrespectful to a police officer. And while whether or not he charged at Darren Wilson is absolutely relevant, it doesn't change the fact that the interaction between these two people is still important to bigger issues in our society.
First, statistically, you cannot argue with the fact black Americans receive disproportionately violent responses from the police. They are stopped and frisked at higher rates. They are arrested at higher rates. They receive harsher sentences. They are incarcerated at higher rates.
Now, what I hear in private conversations, is a lot about "personal responsibility" and "culture" and "poverty." Personally, that seems to be a round about way of saying "They deserve it."
And if that's how you feel, then you let's just put it out there and address it directly. If you think based on the color of a person's skin, that person is more likely to be violent or criminal then just say so. But let's not pretend that because we have a black President, people - including police officers - have stopped making those assumptions.
Because, they. have. not.
And that's why people are so PISSED. Think back to a time when you were accused of something you did not do (if you're black, this should have be easy!) and think about how you would feel if this happened ALL THE TIME. Think about how you would feel if from preschool on you were treated as if you were bad and think about the how that would affect your pschye.
Then, think about if you were not only treated unfairly on a day-to-day basis but also if you knew you and your family were fundamentally excluded from systems meant to provide others with opportunity - historical systems like home ownership as a path to the middle class, political representation as a path to political power, or education as a path to economic independence.
These systems were big and impactful and to think that each generation starts with a clean slate with which to "pull themselves up by their boot straps" is naive at best and deliberately ignorant at worse.
To be honest, I don't know the role personal responsibliity plays in each of our lives. I struggle with this issue a lot - even within my own family.
All I do know is that it's not simple and that it's different for every person. I also know that no amount of personal responsiblity can erase the racism that still exist in our society.
So, the decision of the grand jury doesn't change anything for me. The second story remains unchanged. Black americans are treated unfairly by the police and under the law. Our police forces are over-militarized. Police officers do a very difficult job but they are still human beings that should be held responsible for their use of deadly force - something that does not currently happen in Ferguson or elsewhere.
The Duggar family - stars of the TLC reality show 19 Kids and Counting - is in the news again and not because they added a 20th child to their brood. No, an internet petition on Change.org is calling for TLC to cancel 19 Kids and Counting because of the family's recent opposition to an anti-discrimination ordinance in Arkansas.
The ordinance - which passed by the way - prohibits businesses and public accomodations from discrimination against people based on the person's sexual orientation or gender identity.
I signed the petition.
As snow falls and lights twinkle, we can all hear Andy Williams singing loudly in our ears that the holiday season is "the MOST WONDERFUL time of the year."
Unfortunately, high expectations - both internal and external - can make the last two months of the year the most stressful time of the year as well, especially for women. Over 40% of American report feeling increased stress about time, money, and relationships during the holiday season.
If you're interested in more ways to avoid holiday stress and create a peaceful holiday season, then check out 21 Days to a Peaceful Holiday consists of 21 days of emails beginning December 1st and running through Winter Solstice on December 21, as well as membership in our 21 Days to a Peaceful Holiday Facebook group.
This course is basically like an online holiday season life coach and support group.
Imagine starting your day with a dear friend who just wants the happiest holiday season for you. Or how would you like to share your morning coffee with a friend who gently asks "Are you taking good care of yourself?" or has conveniently scoured the Internet for quick and easy Advent ideas to make you feel like a Christmas queen with minimal effort?
That's us!
Nurtured Mama and I have written gentle reminders and inspirational ideas on how to decide what holiday memories are important to YOU, how to capture those Christmas moments that come and go so quickly, how to keep the consumption and indulging to a healthy minimal, how to simplify gift giving, and much, much more!
We tackle everything from the emotional, like how to deal with difficult people during an already stressful time and how to embrace the romance of the season, to the practical, like simple gift DIYs and easy traditions to start tomorrow.
Nothing is required. You can give as little or as much energy to our suggestions as you want. What WE want is to make this holiday season brighter, easier, and yes more peaceful!
Steve Jobs once said, "Everybody in this country should learn to program a computer... because it teaches you how to think."
Learning the language of computer coding was once thought to be a niche skill needed only by those wanting to pursue a career in programming. No longer. As our world (and economy) changes, computer literacy as valuable an asset to anyone in our information age as a second language and parents want their own children to learn this important language along with reading and writing.
Luckily, a degree in computer science is not required to teach your kids how to code. Initiatives like Code.org have touched off a wide variety of products that remove the intimidation factor and teach the basics of coding to children as young as 4.
Recently a friend of mine shared an incident involving her son that left her extremely upset. Her young son had innocently expressed a preference in playmates based on the color of another child’s skin. My friend was horrified and wondered where he had gotten the idea that we would judge one another based on the color of our skin.
I absolutely understood her reaction. No parent wants his or her child to express racist attitudes or stereotypes. However, the reality is that racism pervades our society and children – while maybe not tactful – aren’t stupid and are perceptive. They understand that race is important. So important in fact, that the adults in their lives don’t often talk about it and when they do they tiptoe around it.
This weekend I confessed in my weekly email (subscribe if you haven't already!) that I've been preparing for Christmas for months. The presents are bought and wrapped. The Christmas cards are ordered, addressed, and stamped. And this week I started decorating.
Instead of killing myself to get my entire house decorated the weekend between Thanksgiving and December 1st like I usually do, I'm taking my time decorating each room at my own pace. The biggest benefit so far is I've had time to redesign my decor and complete projects I've been wanting to do for years.
Pinterest is a great source of inspiration but I'm hoping this post to be a great MOTIVATOR. Here are the projects I pinned - primarily holiday themed - that I completed this weekend!
