My name is Jenny. My internet last name is On The Spot. So, Jenny On The Spot is my full name.
But you can call me Jenny.
I am female. I have aged in the the early part of my 4th decade. I have 3 kids... 9, 12, and, 15. If you do the math I will soon have TWO teenagers, one of whom will be a licensed driver by the beginning of the summer.
Yes, I need a hug. Thank you for asking.
I am in no condition to run a 5k. But neither is my friend Sarah here, but she actually has a good reason... Related: COME ON LITTLE GUY! WE WANT TO SEE YOUR BABY FACE AND BABY TOES.
And mommy probably wants to SEE her OWN toes.
I just want to thank Sarah for entrusting me with prime real estate on her blog here today.
Inviting someone to share something on your blog is a lot like allowing a someone to throw a party at your house.
As the party thrower in this, Sarah's home... I had some concern.
WHAT IF I TRASH THE PLACE?!
WHAT IF SHE DOESN'T HAVE DISH TOWELS?
There was one time I threw a baby shower at another person's house (an acquaintance). Or was it a wedding shower? In any case... I got there with a whole lot of food to prep. and did you know SOME PEOPLE DON'T USE DISH TOWELS?
I have no idea what the alternative is, but I may or may not have a *thing* about dishtowels...
Especially white ones.
Piece of Advice #1: Always have plenty of dish towels. I recommend white because you can bleach out the shame that certain messes leave on dish towels.
I also have a *thing* about baby wipes.
Piece of Advice #2: Baby wipes aren't just for babies anymore.
That's not really an advice statement.
What I MEANT to write was... Never don't have baby wipes on hand.
That's better.
If you ignore the double negative and whathaveyou.
My babies are no longer babies... but I assert - babies are not needed to keep baby wipes on hand. I keep them in the car, and in the bathroom, and in the kitchen, and in the laundry room... Baby wipes are the rich uncle to the nephew who always has to get bailed out of jail.
In short: You never know when you are going to need a rich uncle/baby wipes.
Piece of Advice #3: Don't do anything that would put you in a place where you will need to get bailed out of jail/call your rich uncle. That should go without saying, but... PEOPLE THESE DAYS.
I'm not trying to mother you, but I am a mom. Don't go to jail. BECAUSE I SAID SO.
Piece of Advice #4: Don't trust anyone who offers advice without solicitation.
Except me.
Piece of Advice #5: Be kind to yourself... like that one friend you have that is way too sweet. Be her (or him), to yourself. I don't actually know how to do that, but I've read we people tend to be quite hard on ourselves and I've always wanted to take that advice.
Piece of Advice #6: Drink plenty of water everyday. That's always good advice. If I do say so myself.
Piece of Advice #7: Make time for friends. I have been really bad about this, so this is just as much a reminder for me as it is for you.
Warning: if you DO end up having to get bailed out of jail, it will probably be because of friends like my friend there on the left.
Totally worth it.
Piece of Advice #8: Don't wait until the day before you are supposed to meet with your tax guy to pull together all your stuff for your personal taxes and 2 small businesses. Just don't. Trust me.
Piece of Advice #9: If you are a dog owner... never give your dogs the benefit of the doubt. They WILL work very hard to consume the roll of tape/lip gloss/leather boots/Converse/paperback book/hardback book you left out... Your daughter's "very special" water bottle you saw sitting on the coffee table as you were running out the door very late and thought, "Oh that'll be fine."
It will not be fine.
#thugs
Piece of Advice #10: If you have children... your kids are smarter than you.
I guess that's not advice. It's a truth statement that you really need to be aware of.
Just because a person can't speak, tie shoes, or eat solid food... doesn't mean they're not smart. OH NO. They may not be able to sit up on their own but they have got you wrapped around their tiny (yet chubby) little finger. ALL OF THEIR FINGERS.
There's really no advice (a.k.a. WARNING) one can give when it comes to children and their cunning. The best I can give: Just beware.
They're worse than dogs.
But also way better.
Even at 9, 12, and 15 they still have me wrapped around their not-so-little fingers.
Piece of Advice #11: Take lots of selfies with your people...
You just have to. It's the very best. That is something you will never regret.
Your teen might regret it, but your teen is still living under your roof, so... SELFIE TIME!
The last thing I would like to add is...
MERRY NEW BABY TO MY FRIEND! I feel all the emotions when my friends add to their numbers. The excitement. The fear. Sometimes jealousy (I don't even know why I miss those sleep-deprived baby days, but golly I sure miss those days sometimes!). The joy... that new baby head smell!
There really is no new advice under the sun. Just the reminder to sleep when you can (I regret not heeding that advice), soak in all the baby goodness... revel in the beauty of new sibling love. It will never be more sweet than in the beginning. Because sibling rivalry kicks in and... I'm sorry. I am digressing...
Kiss those cheeks, take lots of pictures (SELFIES TOO, MAMA!), let that little guy melt into your chest for long naps. It goes so fast. As you know. Those moments are THE moments. And you just can't jump back in time to do it again.
At least I don't think we can time travel just yet...
